Responsible Versus Overprotective Parenting

Of course you want to see your child succeed and will work hard to make sure they have all the opportunities they deserve. However, it is important to make sure that in wanting the best for your child that you are not being overprotective. The danger in being overprotective is that your child may not learn how to be responsible for themselves, may not learn that there are natural consequences for their behavior and may not learn the lesson that hard work can pay off. Signs that you may be overprotective of your teenager are:


• You will do whatever it takes to see your child successful

• You make excuses for your teen and blame others for things that go wrong

• You “rescue” your teenager – you bail them out of difficult situations every time

• You are always going out of your way to make your teenager happy

• You minimize problems that your teenager is having or you try to rationalize their behaviors

• You try to always be liked by your teenager and give in to all their requests – even when you don’t agree

• You try to “appease” your teen and rescue them form difficult feelings – you never allow them to sit with uncomfortable feelings

If you notice that you are doing some or all of these things, you may want to consider allowing your teenager to fail sometimes or experiences the real consequences of their decisions so that they learn how to take responsibility for their actions as well as learn how to take action to change situations they do not like instead of always relying on you to do so.



Go to Elite Life Coaching for additional parenting resources and to get information on our coaching packages and specials!

Enjoy Your Teen

Enjoy your teenager. Make sure that despite any frustrations or stress they are causing you, that you take time to laugh, appreciate their strengths and tell them about it. Positive energy is contagious so be positive about their uniqueness and appreciate what they have to offer the world.

Go to Elite Life Coaching for additional parenting resources and to get information on our coaching packages and specials!

Parents Need To Agree

It is critical that your teenager never sees you openly disagree about rules or consequences with your spouse or co-parent. While there may be times when you have differing opinions about a particular situation, it is important that you have such discussion away from your teenager so that they experience consistency and know that you will support one another’s decisions. Not doing this will likely result in your teenager playing one of you against the other which can cause significant conflict and additional stress in your lives.

Go to Elite Life Coaching for additional parenting resources and to get information on our coaching packages and specials!

Rules And Consequences - Involve Your Teen

Have you ever tried to include your teenager in establishing fair rules and consequences? Sometimes this is really powerful and significantly reduces arguments when rules are broken. If doing this, it should be during a calm time when the whole family can sit together and be thoughtful. Most importantly, whether rules and consequences are created with or without your teenager, it is important that you are always consistent and that your teen is clear about what is OK and what is not OK before the rules are broken.

Go to Elite Life Coaching for additional parenting resources and to get information on our coaching packages and specials!

Parenting With Your Ex

Being able to co-parent a teenager following a divorce or separation can be very difficult, however, it is really important that you and your ex are able to work cooperatively in the eyes of your teen. Sometimes communicating via a neutral party or via email or text is easier for ex-partners than trying to have ongoing conversations. Remember to always do what is best for your child, not what is best for you. Your child wants to have a positive relationship with both their parents and it is important that both parents allow for and support this which may mean making compromises or not “winning” certain disagreements. Putting your child first will pay off in the long run and you will spare them the lasting and sometimes significant effects of being placed in the middle of a divorce.

Go to Elite Life Coaching for additional parenting resources and to get information on our coaching packages and specials!

Getting Support For Yourself

You should seek outside help for your teen if they have become violent or aggressive, are regularly using or abusing drugs or alcohol, if they are running away, if they are getting involved with the law, if you are feeling like you need to resort to violence as a means of managing their behavior or if you feel they are engaging in other risky or dangerous behaviors. The consequences of not addressing such behaviors can be significant and parents in this situation are in need of outside, professional support to help get things back on track for their teen and for their family as a whole.

For further information or to sign up for our free bi-weekly newsletter go to the Elite Life Coaching website.

Addressing Suspicions of Substance Use or Abuse

If you suspect your teenager is using drugs or alcohol, you should not look the other way. In addition, you should not address this issue with them unless your own emotions are under control. The most effective approach is when parents confront their teens with suspicions or concerns of substance use in a calm and supportive manner, letting their teen know they are worried, but also that they still love them and don’t think negatively of them as a person for using substances.

For further information or to sign up for our free bi-weekly newsletter go to the Elite Life Coaching website.

Just Listen To Them

Many parents struggle with getting their teenager to talk to them, which is ironic because teenagers are usually pretty self absorbed and think they are at the center of the world. A tip to get your teenager to talk to you is to just listen. Don’t judge or try to give lectures or advice (unless they are asking) but rather just listen, show interest and validate what they are saying.

For further information or to sign up for our free bi-weekly newsletter go to the Elite Life Coaching website.

Get To Know Their Friends and Connect

Invite your teenager’s friends to dinner. This is a great way to connect with your teenager and also to let them know that you are interested in what is important to them. It is important to make sure you do not embarrass your teenager with too many questions or embarrassing stories from their past when meeting their friends (and remember, they are very sensitive!) or else they will make sure they keep their friends away in the future.

Giving Teens Choices

Giving teens choices is important. This helps them learn to make healthy decisions and learn to deal with the natural consequences of their choices. Try to think of areas where you can give your teen choices which may stop them from arguing about everything while also helping them learn responsibility.

For further information or to sign up for our free bi-weekly newsletter go to the Elite Life Coaching website.

Connecting With Your Teenager

Even if your teenager is pulling away, it is important to work to spend quality time checking in with them with them each and every day. Knowing your teenager – what they like, don’t like, how they are doing in school and with friends makes a big difference in the overall impact of your parenting. Make sure you are checking in with your teenager (while not being overbearing), even if they respond in a way that makes you feel like you are a nuisance.

For further information or to sign up for our free bi-weekly newsletter go to the Elite Life Coaching website.